New Order: A Decluttering Handbook for Creative Folks (and Everyone Else) by Fay Wolf

Our library system can keep me busy reading organizing books for years! I just finished reading New Order: A Decluttering Handbook for Creative Folks (and Everyone Else) by Fay Wolf as a follow-up to The Art of Discarding. The best part about New Order is its detailed resourcefulness. There are lists of charities and several website and apps suggested throughout the book.

Personally, the best part about reading this book was her suggestion to use an app as a daily to do list. I used lists on old-fashioned (joyful) paper to accomplish daily tasks. Yet, when I downloaded Wunderlist, things got, well, awesome! Wunderlist allows me to enter any task I want to get done (and I can categorize it by any lists I’d like). I get to enter the date and if I’d like a reminder, and also see a daily and weekly breakdown. It has a satisfying “ping” when I check an item off the list, and I can modify daily tasks to include last-minute things to accomplish. Finally, I can alter due dates of things that didn’t get done, and get reminders for those in the future. In fact, this blog post is on my to do list for later this week, but I had 30 minutes before a library run, so I looked ahead at what I could start and, well, here we are. Did I mention Wunderlist is free? How fantastic is that?

I took another great nugget from this author about budgeting work time (again she suggests a handy website). I’m trying it with my children and may implement it in our homeschooling routine, which is just around the corner!

I’d recommend this book to those who need specific resources for donating items or really need to work on budgeting time. What great organizing book do you love?

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The Art of Discarding by Nagisa Tatsumi

It is no secret Marie Kondo felt inspiration by the book The Art of Discarding, How to Get Rid of Clutter and Find Joy by Nagisa Tatsumi. She mentions she read it on the train and missed her stop because she was so self absorbed in it! Clearly, I was excited to get my copy from the library to see what was so motivating.

With only 166 pages this book is a quick read, but don’t be fooled, it is sufficiently dense. The author suggests we can shop and enjoy new things, we just need to be comfortable with discarding as a viable method to move items out of our homes. She talks about ten attitudes we can build to prevent clutter and more easily discard, including deciding whether to keep or discard immediately and often, using items routinely, setting realistic timeframes for use, and also not falling into “storage” system’s false promises.

From here the author gives ten strategies for discarding. She refers to possible scenarios in her first section and denotes special methods for special clutter. In the end she discusses our relationship with “stuff” and spurred some pondering for me about the benefits and drawbacks of recycling. 

I can see how Marie Kondo became inspired to declutter after reading this book. It’s very practical and straight-forward. As a tidying enthusiast, I do enjoy ideas and opinions on decluttering. One thing I found very promising from this book is how special tidying is for each individual. I love how the author suggests each of us has different trouble categories and different methods we employ more easily.

When I attended the Konmari Consultant Seminar in April, we all had to share pictures of our kitchens. It was brought to our attention how different each kitchen is, even though we all tidied using the Konmari Method™! The more I tidy with clients, the more I see this is true. We are all so unique, it’s so exciting to see how the end results compare to others.

Be Brave. Let it Go.

Clutter comes from the postponed decision of what to do with an item. When we gather all like items together to sort, we are deciding to decide! We are taking the time to confront our indecisiveness and with Marie Kondo’s inspiration we shift this process from a negative one to a joyful one. Some items will be kept and some will be discarded.

As Marie Kondo explains in her book, The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up, while tidying she kept searching for reasons to let an item go. She spent years cleaning and decluttering her room and still it felt cluttered. Then she had the realization that by focusing on only what to get rid of, she was focusing on unhappiness. Instead, by keeping those items she loved, she shifted her tidying focus and inspired millions. So her criterion for keeping an item is that it “sparks joy.”

When you decide to tidy, enjoy the focus on the happiness that the item brings. It’s very easy to keep items we love. In fact, this is the easiest part. However, what if the item doesn’t spark joy? Here is where you can be brave! Get comfortable with the thought of letting it go. At this point you have decided to decide on each item’s role in your life. It’s almost like the item is interviewing for a position in your life. Why keep something that doesn’t support your goals or ideals? Why keep an old gift that you don’t feel pretty wearing? Why keep something that sits hidden in the corner of your closet? Be brave. Let it go.

Next post will go into more detail on how to let it go, for now, just become comfortable with discarding.

How Can I Make Someone Else Be Organized?

I’ve been asked, “I am organized, but how do I make someone else be organized?” While you cannot force people to organize, there are some things you can do to inspire others to be organized. This may seem frustrating, but this may be a lesson to yourself. Perhaps you are more annoyed with their lack of organization than they are? Still, for those of us sharing living spaces, there are fortunately some things you can do to help others think more about what they own and how they’d like to treat it.

1. Worry about yourself first.

Before you start blaming those around you remember to sort things out for yourself. It is ideal to go through the Konmari Method on your own, focusing only on your items. You may realize that some things you were blaming on others, were actually your own doing. For example, I was annoyed with my boys not putting books back on the shelves and would remind them often to put them away. Then we tidied their books all together and they deleted an ample amount. Looking at the pile that no longer sparked joy for them, I realized I had books up there they no longer used, creating a more cramped space and less desire to maintain their space. I was part of the problem because I kept saving books that they weren’t reading! These realizations are helpful, creating dialogue to work together to solve problems instead of blame.

2. Inspire.

When you tidy your things the Konmari way, you streamline your prep times, enjoy more time with your hobbies, don’t fall prey to marketing tricks that drag in more clutter, and those immediately around you notice. My family was very eager to have their clothes drawers look as tidy as mine and absolutely asked for help tending theirs.

3. Don’t Judge.

We are all unique people, at unique stages in our lives, with differing fears and goals. When you tidy your own items it is easier to understand what brings joy and what does not. When you are surrounded by family members with outdated, muddy work boots, and lego pieces galore, it’s a bit challenging to see the joy in those. In fact, is very easy to focus on the smell and mess or the pain when tripping over bricks. Instead, try to take a deep breath and don’t judge. Perhaps if I drove tractors and dump trucks, muddy work boots would be very joyful, a reminder of a good day’s work? Perhaps if I was an elementary school boy, I would see legos as the easiest way to bring magical ideas to fruition? Equally, I’m sure my family is bewildered by several of my purchases, especially because I’m the only girl in the family.

4. Don’t get rid of their things unknowingly.

Even if you are upset with the “stuff” of others, please avoid the temptation to get rid of it secretly. In fact, this will back fire on you. Most people who don’t like organizing actually have the fear you will get rid of their items. If you actually DO get rid of their items without permission, it’s possible they will ask if you’ve seen that item. How do you answer this? If you are honest, you tell them that you are secretly choosing items of theirs you think they no longer need and getting rid of them. If you lie, you are lying. If you are the person who’s items are being secretly deleted, how would that make you feel? What if someone you lived with got rid of something that sparks joy for you, but they judged and didn’t think it was joyful? I met a woman who was married 10 years and her husband still brings up that she got rid of a pair of his boots!

5. Offer to help honestly.

When you offer to help, do it honestly. Do it because you truly want to help that person succeed in tidying their items. Do it because you want your children to be able to create lego cities for hours of screen free play time. Do it because you want your husband to be able to find the tool he needs in the middle of an oil change. You can absolutely mention that a space is driving you crazy (they probably already know) and you’d like to help. But make sure you are equally honest with your confession. Tell them, by working together, you think the space could be tidier bringing you peace of mind (a benefit to them as well – less nagging!) and an easier way for them to find their things, maintain their space, or whatever their goals may be.

A lot of “making” others organize has more to do with you than you may realize. Your desire to tidy up others’ items may be more due to your visual needs than theirs. Instead of focusing on what they are doing wrong (to you), it’s best to focus on what can change, helping to set goals, and offer honest help when you can.

Containers.

Your main storage is in your drawers. To divide your drawers pack them like bento boxes looking for containers that are rectangular or spark joy or hopefully both.

The best way to store items in your drawers according to Marie Kondo’s The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up is in shoeboxes. They are sturdy and usually attractive. So every time you see a shoebox, give it a once over and decide if it could be put into service. Then, fold socks, line them inside and stick it in the drawer with underwear, or fold camisole shirts and stick it in with shirts. It’s a fabulous way to keep like items together.

What if you don’t have a lot of shoeboxes? Then when looking for containers focus on two things, rectangles and/or beauty. The item in the photograph is a thrifted tissue box container. It had a top that I recycled and I use it to store lined up granola bars and applesauce in our pantry. For me it has both qualities. The plastic is also useful in the kitchen because these items are more likely to get wet or spillage. I also have an old wooden library card drawer that my tea is lined up in and a wooden drawer divider for other powdered packages. Again, these both serve both categories for me.

In the end, you can break the rectangle rule if your container brings you joy. I worked with a client who had some round trinket boxes in her jewelry drawer. While they are not the perfect shape, we made them fit just fine and they are winners because of their beauty.

Tidying With My Children.

I wanted to take a moment to tell you about how I’ve learned to tidy with my boys. The younger fella on the left, he loves it, most of the time. The fella on the right doesn’t believe in tidying. He thinks it is an excuse for me to get rid of his things.

Oh my goodness, children get a lot of things! When I became a mother, I quickly became overwhelmed by the gifts the boys received. Not only at birthdays and holidays, but also from the grocery store clerk and the dentist and the neighbor’s mother and so on. It’s all given in kindness and very thoughtful, but it adds up insanely fast. I had no choice but to reduce their items or we’d have overflowed quickly.

I kept this habit as they grew. That’s when I got caught. I would rid of something they hadn’t touched in a long while and of course they’d start asking for that item. I felt bad, but I knew it was ultimately essential to continue clearing items because another birthday, Christmas, or grandparent gift was just around the corner.

Then I learned from The Life Changing Magic of Tidying Up by Marie Kondo, that you cannot tidy other people’s items. Only they have the right to choose the items they love, just as adults. That’s when I started to involve them.

When I started this I was worried about two things:

  1. They’d want to keep everything.
  2. They wouldn’t want to keep the things I wanted them to.

Here is what actually happened:

  1. They did NOT want to keep everything. In fact, when we discussed their selecting only the items that spark joy, they were very comfortable selecting what they wanted to keep.
  2. Some items I wanted them to keep, they didn’t want to own any more. This led to an important realization, I was actually contributing to some of their clutter problem by making them keep some things only I thought was adorable! That was truly unfair because I was stealing some of their space for their favorite items!

In her book, Marie Kondo recommends tidying with children as young as three. They can select the items they love easily by this age and by starting then I could have forgone the sneaking route, leading to better habits. (My initial tidying methods probably created some or at least added to my older son’s tidying skepticism.)

With this in mind, it’s important to remember that time is very different for young children. They may not understand that an item they discard today won’t be available to them ever again. When we tidy sentimental items, I have found the best option is to create an “in limbo” tote storage for reassessment. This way the boys can reaffirm their choices, especially if they seem to want to rid of an item that seems surprising to me. Basically, if the boys brought up a missing stuffed toy they wanted to keep, I’d check the tote and bring it back out, but ask what we could put in instead. I’d also limit this to one tote for a short period of time, as not to create a whole new storage clutter problem. While this may seem counterproductive, I feel it is respectful of their needs. It contributes to their sense of security alongside developing a habit of tidying. Most of the time, they don’t ask for the items and it got cleared.

Now that they are older, as we repeat the tiny clear outs that occur before holidays or birthdays, they understand the process fully and tidy like any adult.

Children are fabulous at tidying, I shouldn’t have been so worried to try. I would highly recommend tidying alongside your child with an open mind. You will see their personalities and skills develop in a meaningful way.

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The Folding.

Folding and storing items upright is a fantastic way of seeing all that you own at a glance. The Konmari approach teaches folding from your very first lesson, so you can master and enjoy it straight away! When you see all of your items at once, you can quickly appreciate which you use the most and easily diagnose those you don’t. Also, your items don’t tumble, bundle, or slide from a shapeless stack, leading to frustration and/or missing items.

Your very first Konmari lesson focuses on clothing: gathering, selecting those that spark joy, and then folding and tidying them away. Your drawers will be folded, organized, and filed so you can find the items you love quickly.

Konmari Chicago Seminar April 2017.

Gloomy weather didn’t affect us inside. This past weekend in Chicago IL, along with 79 other participants, I was so excited to dig deeper into the Konmari Method. The well-presented content and engaging activities left me feeling not only excited about Zen Tidy, but also extremely connected to the other participants. I can tell the community experience is a vital part of this certification process.

Daily encouragement from staff led us to mingle at multiple tables, with multiple fellow certifiers, who inevitably had experiences to share, inspiring input, and stories to help all those around. My love for the Konmari Method only grew.

(Apparently, we had a news reporter among us as well. See the article in the Chicago Tribune.)

I’m mapping out the plan for continuing certification, confident this will be a perfect fit for my knowledge and passion. As a homeschooling, stay at home mother, I spend countless hours, days even, at home. Konmaring my home created a sanity haven! To be able to help others create space, order, and intention in their space is my dream come true. To involve future generations, encouraging them to tidy young, is so vital.

Lego Camera.

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I found The Lego Christmas Ornaments Book: 15 Designs to Spread Holiday Cheer by Chris McVeigh at the library and paged through it for the boys. When I saw the camera I knew I’d bring it home. Then I told the boys I wanted to make the camera for myself using their stash, if that was okay.

They said it was just fine. Little Fella decided he’d like to help. The little square book propped open on the floor, we dug for matching colored pieces and cheered when we located what we needed. Then Little Fella started suggesting doing things differently, taking the step by step directions as suggestions rather than rules. Then he grabbed it out of my hands and took over. Just like that it was complete (and a bit different than the one in the book). Now it sits in our bedroom on our tiny bookcase, our little homemade camera. Because in the end, books are just suggestions, right? I’m glad he learned that so young.

Favorite Book: Art Detective: Spot the Difference by Doris Kutschbach.

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Our night-time schedule is different now. I used to put both boys to bed at the same time after one reading. Now, our older son wishes to go to bed earlier than our younger son. The little fella is not ready to accept the single reading for both as the final show, so after we all read together, I read with just him. Except, I don’t really want to read another chapter book after just reading one (we read LOADS enough as it is.) I found this fabulous book and he and I worked together for a couple of weeks.

Art Detective: Spot the Difference by Doris Kutschbach uses famous pieces of art juxtaposed. One is the original, one has several “mistakes.” We had to look back and forth over and over at both pieces to find the errors. For a boy who loved Where’s Waldo and a tired mom, this book was just the ticket!

I’ve found the most fun way to expose the boys to great works of art is to engage them with a game or questions, both requiring searching the art for an opinion or answer. In this way we noticed funny animal poses and shy faces, weird historical artifacts and fabulous fabrics. We started sharing our opinions on the art, what we liked and didn’t, unprompted. But most importantly, it was fun and I find that’s a great note to head off to slumberland.